Atypical…let’s wait and see

I just received a phone call from my dermatologist’s office. Since it wasn’t the doctor on the phone, I immediately assumed that it was good news on all fronts – yes, and no. The one mole on my thigh was normal, no malignancy. Awesome news since that one started changing a few months ago – growing in size but not symmetrical, weird coloration, got kinda bumpy… So I was glad to hear that it was nothing to worry about.

But the other spot on my calf – the one I actually wasn’t too concerned about – she paused before she continued. It’s atypical. The doctor would like for you to come back in six months to be re-evaluated. Hmmm. I guess the person on the other end of the call doesn’t know my history. “Well, I already have my three-month follow up scheduled for June. I think she’s probably going to look at it then.” Oh, said the woman on the other end, so you don’t want to make a six month appointment now? Umm, no, I’ll totally get on that in three months since I’m on the hook to see y’all every three months as it is.

Atypical… that sounds so nebulous. Not exactly anything bad, but not 100% A-OK either. I’ve been peering at both spots since last week, trying to figure out how they’re healing. Is that normal healing? The spot on my thigh is really red and itchy, almost like an infected mosquito bite. The spot on my calf, the atypical, has a dark circle in the middle of the red and itchiness. Is it a scab? Is it angry melanoma? I get that we’re doing a wait and see approach. But with my history of aggressive atypical melanoma, I’m sort of concerned about the whole “let’s see what happens” situation.

Most of the reading I’ve been doing says that just because you have an atypical mole doesn’t mean you will develop melanoma. But what about if your body has proven that it is perfectly capable of growing malignant cells, what then? I’m trying to find an answer and it seems like there is a lot of conflicting information out there. Some advocate a wait and see approach, with the idea that in six months, you would be able to see if there have been significant changes to warrant another biopsy. A few dermatologists say that in a patient that has already presented with melanoma, it’s best to just treat an atypical mole like another melanoma and remove it completely to reduce the risk of spread. I don’t really want another scar on my opposite leg if it’s really just something that needs to be watched. But at the same time, I’d prefer to be on top of things and not have to have something even more involved down the road.

Why do I feel like I’m going to be spending lots of time examining my calf in the coming months?